【AS】Eliminate troubles of high IQ Asperger who feels lonely



I am Japanese high IQ person.


High IQ person always thinks to solve things.
Therefore, focus on a part, consistent part, truth, essence, purpose and talk.



So often that the conversation is not established or things that are not understood or

evaluated often, so you often experience collisions and loneliness.



And the more IQ difference, the more difficult the conversation is,

and it seems to me that I am stupid.



As a result, desire for approval is likely to increase,

spurring negative thoughts peculiar to Asperger.



However, in the case of usual human relations,

there were many cases where I gave up thinking about solutions,


Only after being born on marriage,

I began to think about ways to live with regular IQ partners.



So, as a memo, as a share it, to deepen my thought,

In order to keep it in order in order,

if you are in trouble with similar things, please do not miss it.


table of contents

What is IQ


IQ is an intelligence exponent, and its definition is various,
Personally, it is said to be one of the people with the highest IQ in Japan,
I am adopting the definition Mr. Hideto Tomabechi's, advocated.
He often sympathizes with his way of thinking.



It is not quotations or excerpts, so it differs slightly from the content of his work,

Its definition is high abstraction thinking ability and its high problem solving skill.


What is abstraction thinking


Abstraction thinking is to think things in contrary to concrete,

As the field of view became wider,

it became possible to grasp actual conditions and essence,

It is a thinking method that can lead to problem solving.


Mind map


To explain it clearly, use Mind Map.

This is it.




This is a simple subdivision of married life.



Keepning a married life is an abstract, truth, essence, purpose.

The more you go to the right, the more concrete the means becomes.


What happens when IQ is high


Briefly, if IQ is high, abstraction thinking can be done,

the field of view becomes wider, and the ability to solve problems increases.



As an example of Mr. Hideto Tomabechi,
When he was thirteen, he went to America without knowing English,
He seems to have mastered English in a week.



For example in my case, it took time,
Severe insomnia from childhood, autonomic imbalance, emptiness, Dependence, obsession could be cured by self-study and analysis.



From here, it will be an explanation using the previous mind map.



The most important thing is maintaining the leftmost married life.
It is the thought method of high IQ person who thinks focusing here.
And, people with low IQ will stick to concrete means as shown on the right.



It does not solve even if it sticks to concrete means.

Means are means,
It will change each time in order to achieve the purpose.



And this mind map can be diverted.



For example,
I will apply concrete quarrels and content of conflict to the right.


And if you continue to answer their reasons and causes,
Abstract, essence, truth, purpose, It is a consistent answer.



Then, If you take countermeasures against the contents that apply to the far left,
The problem is solved fundamentally.



It seems to repeat, but this is the thinking method of high IQ people.
Mr. Hideto Tomabechi thinking method of high IQ person,
It is called a thought method with high dimensionality.
It is said that the abstraction degree is high = the dimension is high.


What happens when the IQ is low


When IQ is low, the field of view narrows, sticking to concrete things,
It is easy to be brainwashed by information and tied to a fixed concept,

so you can not grasp the essence and the truth,

so the problem solving skill becomes low.



When considering things, it is easy to understand if you think extremely,
Take an example of a person with intellectual disabilities.

People with intellectual disabilities can not notice various things

because of their narrow vision.



For example, so that you can talk with your fingers anytime, anywhere,
Even if you have lowered items with characters lined up on your neck,
It is said that at that time, they will forget to use that item.



They can see only one thing.



Conversely, it is the thinking method of high IQ people

who seems to see various things as if they look from the sky.


We will not be understood or appreciated, will be lonely


I explained it as concretely as possible before I got to this chapter,

but I think that people with normal IQ can not understand at all.



In general, it is easier to understand if I explained by text than speaking,

but I think that people with low IQ can not understand.



If so, it will be impossible for us to understand the idea of high IQ persons

through regular conversation exchanges.



High IQ people are not understood, not evaluated.

Sometimes it seems stupid from people with low IQ.



Even in the workplace, if the IQ of the evaluator such as the boss is low,

it is not correctly evaluated and often receives unreasonable evaluation,

but even if they explain it to any extent,

it can not be understood that it is unreasonable thing.



Even if the parent's IQ is low, we will not be evaluated correctly.

It continues to be denied from childhood.

Then, desire for approval increases, frustration accumulates,

and attackability also increases.



In the worst case, like me, we are unilaterally disconnected from our family.

I was actually told by my family.
"I do not want to get involved with you, so I will get out of relationship."



Even if we talk with anyone you will not be evaluated.

Only the same high IQ people heal such high IQ people.


How to think about it


Since I got married to a foreigner,

I began to think about ways to improve our relationship.



In order to fundamentally solve the problem, judgment materials are necessary.

To that end frequently ask a partner frequently "Why?"




it seems to the general public that the question seems to have been accused,

feeling that the implied meaning of "answer quickly" is included in the question.

So, I can not ask much questions.



Besides, communicating the fundamental solution method to ordinary people is

the same as being told that if I take a superficial measure against a high IQ person,

it will be resolved.



So, in this compatibility it is impossible to discuss each other 's thoughts.

The relationship gets worse as we tell the fundamental solution to normal people,

but it will not be solved.



In such a case, I try to change my mind to make it as close to solution as possible.



Lower the abstraction level a little.

It is not a fundamental cause but measures to deal with one of the factors.



It is not a fundamental solution but to bring it to self-solution.



The method may be a superficial method in a common way,
I do not listen seriously to what the other person says,
Tell the other party only how I felt,
When telling the feelings of anger,

to tell other party that I am in trouble (anger = troubled).



Of course, because that effect is so thin, in order to restore the trust relationship,

It is also important to anticipate what the opponent wants and to hurry.